Some guy in Nigeria is going to send me millions of dollars.
I know, I'm excited too, because I'm apparently also going to get great rates on my mortgage, cheap Viagra and a cure for my thinning hair. And those are just the offers I've received in the past hour - not that I actually need those last two, mind you. I was just giving an example.
If you have an email account, then chances are you've also been offered these and many other things, which sound marvelous, miraculous and other nice words that could possibly begin with the letter "m" for the sake of alliteration. I couldn't find my thesaurus.
Yes, "spam" is a challenge for everyone who uses email these days, unfortunately. From harmless sales pitches to devious attempts to drain your wallet or steal your identity, spam emails are looking to make luncheon meat out of unsuspecting Internet users. Yeah, I know that was a really horrible metaphor, but I just couldn't resist. Sorry.
Essentially junk mail that consists of numerous identical messages sent to numerous recipients, spam is supposedly named after the Monty Python comedy "Spam" sketch. That's the routine in a caf茅 where every item contains the luncheon meat Spam, with a chorus of Vikings occasionally drowning (spamming) out the dialogue. Some of this spam is stuff we've signed up for in one way or another. If you buy something at Futureshop for example, and you give them your email address for the warranty, you'll end up getting their email marketing until you opt out. It's the same anytime you give any company your email address. Chances are it's going to be used to try make someone else money. It could even be - gasp! - sold to some total stranger so they can solicit you as well. Yes, that email name that you cleverly thought up all by yourself is now working for someone else who's using it to troll for business. I know, it sounds totally sordid, doesn't it? Who knew technology was so racy? Well, actually anyone who's typed the word "sex" into an Internet search, but again, I digress.
I don't mind the sales emails, because usually you can easily opt-out of their mailing lists somewhere. It's the devious or malicious ones that you've got to keep watch. Some masquerade as your bank or other institution seeking personal information so they can steal your identity. Those types of spam are known as "phishing." The letters from someone in Nigeria who has money for you are the same type, but they're "phishing" for people gullible enough to send their own money for a promised larger reward. It works because it plays on the fact that greed blinds common sense.
Most email programs automatically filter out the bulk of adult and intrusive spam, but the "spammers" still find ways to get around the word filters. I'm always getting offers of "Hawt Secs" and "Vi@gr-A." What can you do? One idea is to keep your personal email address just for use in day-to-day correspondence with family and friends, and create another you can give to companies, or use on the Internet.
Another thing to remember is if something seems too good to be true, it probably is. Well, except for that one from Bill Gates promising $5 for every person you passed an email on to. That one is for real and I actually have your money. You just need to send me a cheque to cover the money transfer. You never know, it might work.