For many parents, this week has been a welcome return to school, and a welcome return to rhythm and routine. In Simplicity Parenting, rhythm and routine are paramount to life running more smoothly, with fewer frustrations and hopefully fewer arguments - a benefit I will be exploring in great detail during the seven-session course I am offering this fall.
With the lazy and unstructured days of summer over for another season, bedtimes and wake-times are now more structured, expectations of being dressed before 8 a.m. with full tummies will soon be de rigueur. When you take immense flexibility out of the equation (do we put the kids to bed before or after the fireworks?) and replace it with both systemic and systematic order, the need for things such as discipline practically disappear.
Rhythm and routine also go hand in hand with a balanced schedule.
I recently received an email from Simplicity Parenting author Kim John Payne and his wish for everyone as they geared up for school in September was for parents to "dial back" the number of scheduled activities and busy-ness.
"Although it's right the dreaminess of summer is ending, a relaxed and creative child need not just be a summer thing; it can extend right through the whole year if we build in down time each day," Payne wrote. "Being a gatekeeper that holds back as much of the craziness and child-unfriendly stuff that life throws at our families sure is not easy, but it is the most precious gift we can give our children."
Culturally it is not uncommon for parents today to look at virtually everything as an enrichment opportunity for children. Kids are overwhelmed by homework, media, extracurricular sports and activities. All of this leaves our children and teens little time to relax, express themselves creatively in an unstructured way, and breathe out.
This fall, consider how much you've subscribed your child to, whether it has been at your insistence or theirs.
Payne jokes that he often meets families in his counselling practice where a child has piano on Monday, ballet on Tuesday, horseback riding on Wednesday, swimming on Thursday and therapy on Friday!
This year let's embrace the natural rhythms and routines afforded us by the innate structure that school offers. Let's be present to the needs of children to have a bit of a breather - every day and every week. Let's build in times where kids can unwind after school with a snack and some fresh air, and ensure that a few times a week (at least) they can simply do their own thing - whether it's reading a book, playing an instrument, experimenting in the kitchen or anything else that's sole purpose is nothing more than fun.
It's in those moments that their young batteries are recharged. We all know that taking a break from life's daily stresses is the key to being able to give our best in any situation.
Kirsten Andrews is presently offering a seven-session Simplicity Parenting course this fall. Details are at www.SeaToSkySimplicityParenting.com and on Facebook. To register call (604) 892-0197 or email [email protected].
