One of the most important things you can learn in sports — or in life — is that you never know what someone else is going through.
That includes material struggles that a person may be dealing with related to work, family, financial issues, etc. But it also includes the immaterial struggles that can often be even more serious. People who seem completely fine on the outside may be dealing with all sorts of mental health issues on the inside that no one else knows about.
In sports, all we can often react to is what happens on the field, court, or rink: whether a player is playing well or poorly. Sometimes, a player can be struggling for reasons that have nothing to do with their talent level and those reasons could be material, such as an injury or illness, or they can be immaterial, such as a player's mental health. Often, there's a crossover as material causes can lead to immaterial effects.
Canucks fans have seen this firsthand. Brock Boeser had to deal with the tragedy of losing his father, which affected his mental health and his ability to focus on the game of hockey. Given the time and space to deal with that loss, Boeser came back stronger and had the best season of his career. In that case, fans knew what Boeser was dealing with as he was open and honest about his father's health issues and how it affected him. But not everyone is going to be an open book about what is going on in their life.
With that in mind, no one should be speculating about J.T. Miller.
On Tuesday (Nov. 19), the Canucks announced that Miller would be taking an from the team for personal reasons. In a statement, general manager Patrik Allvin said that the "entire organization is here to support him" but had "no further comment" on the matter.
The announcement comes in the wake of Miller being benched in the third period of . According to head coach Rick Tocchet, however, "It has nothing to do with the benching." Tocchet emphasized that people should refrain from speculation.
"I wish him well in this personal matter and we're here to support him, the whole organization," said Elias Pettersson. "All of us are dealing with something, I think."
That latter sentence from Pettersson is key. Hockey players are people first, with all that entails. Hockey is ultimately a job — one that takes up a lot of their lives but isn't their entire life. Players deal with complicated relationships with family and friends, loss and grief, heartbreak and disappointment, and everything else that makes us human.
No one knows exactly what Miller is going through. Postmedia's Patrick Johnston reported that Miller's leave has nothing to do with substance or alcohol abuse, so that, at least, can be ruled out. that he has "been told" that "it's about giving the player a chance to re-set himself mentally." Even then, no one knows the reason why he needed a reset.
Speculating on the reason or reasons would be irresponsible. Worse, it would be invasive. A player's personal life is exactly that: personal.
The only way for any of us — media and fans alike — to know what Miller is going through is if he chooses to tell us. Whether or not he does so is entirely up to him. He doesn't owe any of us a window into his personal life.
The Canucks have been at the forefront of mental health causes in the NHL, spearheading mental health initiatives over the past decade in honour of Rick Rypien. They've taken mental health seriously and given players the resources they need to get help.
For some players, this has meant being open with fans about what they're going through, such as when Tyler Motte . That openness has helped remove the stigma attached to mental health and encouraged people to get the help they need.
But that openness is a choice and not something owed to anyone else.
In the case of Miller, all we can do is be kind and supportive. Anything else should be anathema.
